Estate Planning for New Parents: When to Start and What to Consider

Attorneys Brenton Begley and Haley Matson

Becoming a parent changes everything—your priorities, your perspective, and your responsibilities. One area that often gets overlooked during this exciting (and exhausting) stage of life is estate planning. Many new parents ask the same question: When should we start planning?

The short answer is sooner than you think.

In a recent episode of The Elder Law Report, Attorneys Brenton Begley and Haley Matson sat down to discuss why estate planning is essential for married couples and absolutely critical once children enter the picture.

When Should You Start Your Estate Plan?

From a legal standpoint, any adult over 18 who owns assets should have basic estate planning documents in place. But realistically, most people don’t feel the urgency until a major life event occurs.

Two of the biggest triggers are:

Getting married
Having a child

While marriage is a strong signal to start planning, the birth (or expected birth) of your first child should move estate planning from “someday” to now.

Why Estate Planning Matters When You Get Married

Many couples assume that marriage automatically gives their spouse the authority to make decisions for them. Unfortunately, that’s not the case.

Without proper documents:

Your spouse may not be able to make medical decisions for you.
They may lack authority over financial accounts, real property, or retirement assets.
If you pass away without a will in North Carolina, your spouse may not inherit everything—your parents could be entitled to a portion under intestate succession laws.

Having powers of attorney and a properly drafted will ensures your spouse can step in seamlessly if something happens to you.

Once You Have a Child, Estate Planning Becomes Critical

Once you have a child, estate planning is no longer just about assets—it’s about people.

Choosing a Guardian for Minor Children

One of the most important reasons new parents need a will is to name a guardian for their minor children.

If both parents pass away and no guardian is named:

The court will appoint a guardian
A guardian ad litem or judge—not you—will decide who raises your child

By naming a guardian in your will, that person has priority over anyone else, barring extraordinary circumstances. This is especially important for couples who travel together or recognize the vulnerability of a shared accident or disaster.

Planning for Inheritance and Minor Children

Children cannot legally receive an inheritance outright. Without a plan:

Assets may be held by an estate administrator
A court may control how and when funds are used
Your child could receive full access to significant funds at age 18

Most parents understandably have concerns about an 18-year-old inheriting large sums of money. Estate planning allows you to:

Create a trust for your child
Choose who manages the money
Set ages or milestones for distributions
Restrict funds to specific purposes like health, education, maintenance, and support

Customizing a Plan That Reflects Your Values

Trust planning offers incredible flexibility. Parents can:

Stagger distributions over time
Require education, employment, or military service
Incentivize responsible behavior
Require drug testing
Give trustees discretion to delay distributions if a child isn’t ready

You can appoint someone you trust—perhaps a financially savvy friend or family member—to serve as trustee and manage assets responsibly on your child’s behalf.

McIntyre Elder Law Can Help

If you’re married, you should have foundational estate planning documents in place.
If you have children—or are preparing to—estate planning is essential.

A thoughtful estate plan:

Protects your spouse
Ensures your children are cared for by the people you choose
Preserves assets for their future
Gives you peace of mind knowing your wishes will be honored

At McIntyre Elder Law, we help families across North Carolina—from young parents to retirees—create plans that protect what matters most.

If you have questions about when to start planning, what documents you need, or how to protect your children’s future, schedule a free consultation with us today.

📍 Offices in Shelby, Charlotte, and Hendersonville
📞 Call us at 1-888-999-6600
🌍 Visit our website: www.mcelderlaw.com

Don’t wait until it’s too late—take control of your future today!